Sometimes I can listen supportively for a short period of time. Over the years, in small bits and pieces, I have been able to share small pearls of my Al-anon wisdom. A few months back, she was traveling for an extended period of time. Well, the time came to continue my living amends to her and redo her entire master suite, including her bathroom.
Support for Me and My Family
It is different from an apology, which is “a regretful acknowledgment of an offense or failure”. An apology doesn’t include an action that attempts to make up or compensate for that wrongdoing. That is also a different ball of wax entirely, one that we have written about here.
The Ongoing Nature & Power of Making Amends in Recovery
At Silvermist we are committed to being available for you or your family member day or night, you can call us 24/7. At Silvermist Recovery Center, you can experience one on one care and a customized treatment plan. We proudly offer a Life Skills Curriculum to help young people transition into adulthood.
Step 9 in AA: Examples of Living Amends
They want to find ways of making up for all their past wrongs, and they don’t want to miss the opportunity to do so once their loved one dies. In these cases, they make promises of cleaning living amends up their act and changing their behaviors to their loved ones just before they die. One of the most common reasons people want to make living amends is to correct past wrongs.
Apologizing for the Way You Behaved
Another instance where making direct amends may not be a good idea is if admitting your wrongs could jeopardize your freedom, which could hurt your loved ones. However, if after talking with your sponsor you decide to proceed anyway, make sure you have spoken to your family especially if you are the head of the household or primary source of income. Also, it may not be a good idea to make direct amends if it could potentially stir something up. On the other hand, making amends with someone is more than just words. When you make amends, you verbally recognize that your previous behavior was wrong and you take action to make things right, if possible.
My Loved One Needs Help
- In doing so, you promise to live a sober and honest life and never return to your old ways of lying and hurting the people you love the most.
- For example, if you had an affair for three years during active addiction, visiting your ex to fess up and say you’re sorry isn’t going to help them; it’s going to hurt them.
- She believes that therapy sessions should provide relief while equipping individuals with the tools they need to reach their goals.
- While this step involves a direct exchange with another person, its goal has everything to do with healing and addiction recovery on the part of the person making the amends.
- In the midst of your ninth step, you say to him “I’m so sorry that I stole that money from you and used it for drugs”.
Sometimes an indirect or living amends is the best you can do. Of course, if you can make direct amends you should do so; this is why having a sponsor or advisor to help give you direction is so important. If you aren’t able to make direct amends, then you can volunteer your time or help someone else out.
